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It wasn’t until I started seriously dating that I realized how much of my vision for a relationship was influenced by outside principles and people.For example, I remember being told from a young age by several close women in my life, “You don’t date someone who can’t do anything for you.” I even dated a man who strongly ingrained the same idea into my mind.If so, they may be signs of an abusive relationship.Isolation/Exclusion: "Why do you want to hang out with them?" "If you tell anyone, I'll hurt your family." Minimize, Deny, and Blame: "I didn't mean to push you, I was drunk." "I'm just really stressed about school and work; what do you expect?" "You know I can’t control my anger yet you push my buttons anyway! ” Threats: "If you leave me, I'll kill myself." "If you take that job, I’m moving out and you’ll be on your own!” If you start dating someone else, you will NEVER see your kids again!Sexual Coercion: "If you really loved me, you'd have sex with them" "If you don't want to sleep with me, I'm just going to get it somewhere else." "I'm not wearing a condom." Along with the Power & Control Wheel it is important to recognize the red flags or warning signs of dating abuse.
We have a strong desire to minimize our risks and predict our outcomes.
Here is the phase in life where we conclude that we are no longer assuming a motherly/fatherly role in teaching any man or woman how to be in a relationship.
Here is where we unknowingly commit ourselves to a lifetime of loneliness, because our uncompromising attitude leaves no room for blemishes, as even the most perfect partner is going to come with some inadequacy.
These acts may include physical, sexual, verbal, mental or emotional abuse. It doesn't matter what your gender is, what your sexual orientation is, how old you are, how much money you have, how athletic or popular you are, or who your family is.
Anyone can find themselves involved with someone who chooses to use these controlling behaviors.